Are you getting what you want in life?

What are you getting in life?  Is it what you want?  A couple of years ago, I was scrolling through my podcast app on my smart phone, looking for a new podcast to listen to while running.   I searched for Life Coaches because I wanted to hear from other coaches - their thoughts, methods, ideas, tools, etc.  I found a podcast called, "The Life Coach School" and downloaded episode #1.    I wasn't even 1/2 mile into my run before I heard the creator of the podcast, Master Coach Brooke Castillo describe what I had been teaching for years.  She called it "The Model".        After initially being disappointed that it wasn't my original idea, I got excited, realizing that someone else recognized the value of these ideas. Since then I have listened to over 100 of her podcasts and have integrated much of what Brooke teaches into my coaching.   Today, while going through my emails, I found an article that I wrote back in 2012 called, "What are you getting in life?  Is it what you want?"   Here is the article:     The Life Coaching that I do is based on the concept that what we get in life is determined by what we believe about life and the world that we live in.  So our ability to change what we get in life depends on changing our beliefs. Beliefs  >   Life You may argue that what we get in life is a direct result of our actions.  I don’t disagree.  If this is true, then we should be able to change what we do to alter what we get.  I’ve had some experience with that.  How about you?  Ever wonder why life just seems to keep serving up the same stuff?  Maybe it’s because we keep doing what we do. Actions   >  Life But what determines the actions that we take or avoid?  In other words, why do we do what we do?  What if we do what we do because we feel what we feel?  I feel good, I want to continue to feel good, so I take actions to achieve that.  I feel bad, I want to feel better.  So I take actions to achieve that.  This constant adjusting is like driving a car.  We never hold the steering wheel rigidly.   In order to keep the car on the road, we must continuously make adjustments.  In order to continue to feel good, we must adjust what we do. Feelings  >   Actions  >   Life So why do we feel what we feel?  Is it because of the actions that we take?  It sure looks like it doesn’t it?  But these modifications to feeling and doing are almost always temporary.  It is very difficult to change what we get in life if we are constantly trying to change how we feel by the actions we take.  In fact, all of this effort just wears us out!  I assert that my thoughts determine my feelings.  My story to explain what I experience determines what I feel in association with that experience.  If this is true, then I should be able to change what I think to change how I feel so that I will take different actions and get a better life. Thoughts >   Feelings >   Actions  >  Life Okay.  So far so good.  But why do we think what we think?  My best guess is that it is because of what we believe.  Our beliefs are like powerful magnets that attract only those thoughts that support those beliefs. Beliefs attract supporting thoughts So if we want to change our thoughts, we must change our beliefs.  Easy, right?  Not so much.  Our beliefs have been with us a long time.  In fact, according to Bruce Lipton, cell biologist and author of “The Biology of Belief” our belief systems are fully downloaded by the time we are six years old.  That means that, unless you have figured out a way to reprogram yourself, you are operating on the belief system of a first grader! This is, essentially "The Model" of Brooke Castillo. Although Brooke leaves beliefs out and groups them with thoughts.  A belief is a thought that we think over and over because it makes the most sense to us.  Once we have thought a particular thought long enough, it becomes so believable that it seems like the truth. The other thing that Brooke does with her model is starts it out with C for Circumstances.  We have no control over circumstances but spend so much time trying to control them so that we can get different results.  As Byron Katie would say, "Hopeless"! One of the first questions that I get after talking about The Model is, "How do you change a belief"?   What a great question!  There are many ways.  The methods that I prefer involve questioning the current belief, and identifying a new one that will produce the results that you want.   For more on "The Model" check out www.TheLifeCoachSchool.com and listen from podcast #1.